This is a blog describing my personal adoption experience and on going progress. It has my thoughts, feelings, insights, and complaints on my process and sometimes even the adoption process as a whole. My goal is to create a blog that will show the realistic views of adoption from a birth mothers point of view and hopefully to provide support to others in the same situation that I was and still am in.
Saturday, April 21, 2012
Friday, April 20, 2012
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Replacement
Something horrible has happened this past week.
I have two cats, Juno and Kibo. Juno is more of my mom’s cat. She is social, talkative, and pretty much a small dog. Kibo on the other hand, she’s a stereotypical cat. She ignores you, loves food, and sleeps all day. She doesn’t like anyone in the family…..EXCEPT ME! We don’t know why she does, but she loves me. She have given me kisses, she lets me harass her, and she will sit with me the longest. Her most important and the reason I love her, she knows when I’m sick, upset, or in need of cuddles. She will sit with me for hours, for as long as I want her to sit with me, or she needs something (food, water, etc.).
I love Jude, with all my heart and soul, and no one can ever replace him. Kibo though, is my second baby. She is my love and my angel in so many ways.
After I had Jude, came home, and sat (and cried); Kibo knew. She sat with me every day I was in bed. Some days longer than others, but everyday for at least 3 hours she was there. For that amount of time, great or small, it was like a break from hell. My biggest problem my first few days out of the hospital (other than the obvious of not having a baby), was that the world kept spinning while I was going throw the worst moment of my life. My mom, sister, Victor, and everyone else who supported me were there as much as they could. They still had lives though, that included school, work, errands, etc. and I understood that, but dammit I just needed the world to stop for me! Kibo though, her world is sleeping and sitting. So while Kibo sat with me, I was able to pretended the world stopped for me.
Now, on to the bad news…..
Last week my baby came how with a smallish cut on her ass area. The next day we let her out and it got BIGGER. It almost looked like something grabbed a bit of her fur and ripped out her hair and skin. After a few days of it not healing we finally took her to the vet. $500, stitches, antibiotics, and a cone later she is home and skittish.
While at the vet today though, my mom told my step dad how much it would cost and he flipped. He started going on how he should just shoot her, let her die, or give her back to the pound. I yelled at him no and told him I would pay for it. He said no, but if something happens to her again it was death or the pound for her. I went into room and cried. I don’t care if I spend thousands of dollars on Kibo. I would make a deal with the devil if it meant I could have her happy and healthy for ever. The thought of her dying makes me physically sick to my stomach. To have him threaten to end her, it just…….I felt like I died a little bit. I lost one baby, I don’t want to loose another.
Luckily she has all the medication she needs, my mom and me are spoiling her, and we are making sure she is well taken care of.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)